Everyone Needs a Good Cry

DISCLAIMER: This whole thing is pretty much just so I can read back on it in three months and remember all of the chaos. So feel free to pass on by ;). HA.

It has been the craziest month EVER. And not in the "so many fun things going on!" way. Like literally I have never felt more stressed in my life, and I've done some pretty busy things. I'd never had an anxiety attack before; I have a few friends who have, and while I understood what they were describing, I hadn't actually experienced that. Until this week! Yay. I've just had ALL. THE. THINGS going on. Too many. And most of them have been great things! (i.e. so much family time!) But after a while even lots of good things just add up to be too much, ya know? A list for funsies:

My family in town, wherein I offended family members because I invited friends over. I felt awful. I'm so sorry. Stinkin 95% extrovert Annika ( here) cannot help herself apparently. 

Michael's family in town.

Cousin's baby blessing. 

4th of July with Michael's family. 

Family pictures, wherein we realized the next day there wasn't one of the whole family (and even though it wasn't anyone's fault it kind of felt like my fault because we used my camera?).

Michael's final exam.

My family back in town.

Driving my sister to and from her BYU camp every day for a week.

Potty training Lydia, wherein I became a crazy person for 3 days.

Mild anxiety attack.

24th of July parade, wherein my parked car got keyed (thank you downtown SLC).

24th of July bbq with Michael's family. 

Lydia being afraid to poop, so it takes about 1.5 hours back and forth from the potty any time she needs to go.

MAJOR FLOOD.

Renting all the fans from far away places. 

Really bad finger cut that I should've gotten stitches for but instead I'll just have a cool scar.

Running to Home Depot at 9:30pm to build a gutter and avoid yet another major flood.

Lydia's birthday party, wherein I offended half of earth by keeping it small because we are broke and I cannot feed more than 15 people. But really I've been crying because I feel so bad (extrovert).

Lydia and Cannon sleeping in the same room because of said flood, resulting in terrible sleep for all three of us.

Michael working night shifts. 

So many church responsibilities.

My family back in town.

Roof getting fixed. 

Lydia's actual birthday. 

Carpet getting fixed. 

A steady diet of diet coke and protein bars for breakfast, lunch and dinner. 

Shattered my phone.

Lydia pooping her pants and Cannon simultaneously screaming his head off while getting my phone fixed, wherein I cried in public.

UGH.

On top of all this we are SO tight on money right now. We get our loan in a couple weeks and we are just holding on for dear life till then. We are fine, it's just another added stressor when I've had a terrible day and my house is a disaster (literally, our basement is out of commission) and there's nothing for dinner and we can't just go run and grab something because we have no money so we eat popcorn for dinner, again. ***Actually turning out to be a great diet plan. HA.

I am just plain exhausted. I cannot do it all. I cannot please everyone, I've tried. I can hardly get an hour by myself, and I can't even dream of an hour by myself with NOTHING TO DO. It's been freakin busy. And all of this with no husband, really. 

You know it's bad when every time Michael and I talk, our Big Dream goes from a family cruise, to a couple's cruise, to just one night at a hotel (sleeping in! ah it must be magical!), to just dinner alone. HAHAHAHA. We are just really fun people. 

Speaking of which, I saw a cute mom of two driving a mini van with the bumper sticker "I used to be cool" on it. Ha! That made me lol real good. My life. 

And finally, my favorite thing I've heard recently is: "Treat everyone as if they are going through something really difficult, and more than half the time you'll be right." 

IS THAT NOT TRUE or what. So that's what I've been trying to do the last few weeks. Everyone has trials, even if it doesn't seem like it. Even if their hair is perfect or their kids already know how to read French backwards or their husbands aren't gone 15 hours a day, everyone has trials. So treat them tenderly :).